Lazy… blah blah

Jez Man… if I get any fucking lazier I swear I’ll stop breathing because I just couldn’t be arsed with the effort!

Maybe it has something to do with the massive hangover I was suffering from yesterday. Yeah well, in part that’s true, but it’s also part of a cycle that I am trying to break out of; being totally full-on with stuff, and then being totally bone lazy after the frenzy peters out. I’ve been busy doing a lot of different things, and now the lazy gland has kicked in, and I can feel that I have zip motivation to do anything requiring effort. (Though I can write this blog, but only because I was here at the computer in the first place).

Is that what menopause is? Maybe I am going through the male version of menopause… 20 years early. Is it a midlife crisis? How does something like that affect you anyway? I thought a male midlife crisis made you go out and buy motorbikes and start dating chicks 20 years younger than you, and get hair transplants. Right well I guess it’s not a midlife crisis. Maybe it’s me just being lazy.

I wish mum was a bit closer. When I was a kid, she always used to give me a kick up the arse if I was being lazy and get me moving if I was slothing around too much. Girlfriends are good for that too. Maybe I need a girlfriend. Okay, lets look for one.

*types in girlfriends in google, and clicks I’m feeling lucky*

And this what came back

Hmmm… well I guess I’ll take that as a cosmic sign that this is not the time to find a girlfriend. Maybe it is a sign I should become a lesbian. Do you have to be a female to be a lesbian, or is it like… a state of mind? Sort of like being a hippie.

Couldn’t even be arsed cooking dinner tonight. I also couldn’t be arsed calling for a pizza. There is raw packet spaghetti in the cupboard. Maybe I could chew on some stalks of that for a while and pretend they’re cheese crackers.

Well I won’t give in to my laziness, like I do every other time. I’ll do 30 minutes of cleaning up around the flat, and then I will sit down and write some more of my fabulously original and funny screenplay.

Or I am going to lie down on the couch and contemplate doing those things with the television on.

Lazy, lazy, lazy!

Padwanna.

The Lazy… blah blah by Mentalechoes, unless otherwise expressly stated, is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.