Mentalechoes

Seriously has it been a week since I was here. It feels like only yesterday.

I woke up this morning to one of the most nostaglic moments that I have experienced in a long time. As usual my alarm went off at 8am which is tuned into a local radio station. The first few bars of Don’t You (Forget About Me) was playing by Simple Minds. I hadn’t even opened my eyes at this point and the memories of a day and night 21 years ago began to play across my mind like short movie clips on late night TV.

I was 16 years old and me and a friend, a lovely young girl named Tanya bought tickets to see them together in Bris-vegas. We lived on the Gold Coast at the time so we had to take the train to the “big city” and stay overnight. Tanya and I were not going out together then, and so this was meant to be a friends trip. I had never been away from the Gold Coast on my own; had never been to a big music concert; had never seen a big city before; and had never taken a girl out anywhere more exotic than McDonalds. It was an amazingly scarey-exciting-brand-new experience where every minute burned itself into my mind.

As Jim Kerr sang his way through the tune, I could remember seeing him jumping across the stage at the Brisbane Entertainment Center in his black tights and black felt boots and green jacket with the band behind him. There was a spectacular display of lights and lazers and big concert effects all around, and I was wildly caught up in the rushing human tide as it rode the music crescendo like a surfer does a big wave. I also remembered Tanya, and how looking at her was doing things to my young emotional heart. Strange and wild things that I had never experienced before.

I opened my eyes and thought about that night of the concert and the day that followed. Tanya and I went back to her Aunty’s house and stayed there. Her aunty left us alone in the living room and the two of us stayed up talking. I had never really talked to a girl before and it stirred something inside of me. That night we lay next to each other holding hands and talking. Just talking. We talked to the small hours of the morning before falling asleep. It was an innocent and beautiful moment in my young life; a night that would be unique and defining in all the years to come. The next day we caught the train back home and I raved about that night for weeks afterwards. Tanya and I did get together a couple of months later and spent a year as boyfriend and girlfriend before our lives took us in different directions.

Laying in bed, another peice of conversation with my mother played in my head after Jim had finished his ballad. A few weeks ago Mum told me that Tanya had died a little over a half a year ago. She had developed a very agressive cancer and it killed her in only a few months. She did not suffer much thanks to the comfort of modern chemistry. She had two daughters and a husband when she left. I often thought about Tanya in the years that followed, and then every once and a while in my life after I left Bris-vegas. She was a special girl, and she gave me some special memories which I won’t ever forget. I feel that those memories are worth something more now that Tanya is not here. In some small way, perhaps my cherished memories are another light to illuminate her wonderful life.

After some time I slid off the bed and went to the shower. My day had started, and with it came the busy never ending rush of things to be done that takes our minds off the things that are really important; the happiness of our own heart, and our relationships with our friends and family who are a part of our lives. Jim Kerr though stuck in my mind and so did thoughts of Tanya. I can only think that these echoes from the past are here to remind me to take something good from each day, because in the end, they are the only thing we take with us when it’s our time to move on.

RIP Tanya, you will be missed.

Padwanna!